I am on month four of a lifelong prayer schedule that God has been using to impart to me certain truths. I was initially excited to be of use to Him, and felt like I was closer to understanding my grace giftings and place in His Kingdom. Then I went to house church with a group of young adults that are more developed in their spiritual walks than I am. I watched them join around each other and share giftings from God that seemed so much more powerful than mine, and came so much easier. I got intimidated, vowed to not go back, and started reconsidering His purpose for me. I struggle so much with not being the best at something, I'd rather quit than be in second place. It was a challenge to my comfort zone to actually start this blog, but God's not interested in my comfort. He's interested in my character. While registering a blog name, I first tried many other variations of dailybread that were all taken. I've wondered a few times as to whether those blogs are the same concept as this one, but I'm too scared to look at them to know. What if they're better written? What if they aren't as trivial and "I" focused as mine?
God provided a security for me this morning with service at New Life. A church brother spoke very passionately about how we cannot disqualify ourselves to God. It's an insult to Him to talk down His creations, even when that creation is me. Within the next few days the service mp3 will be on newlifeequip.com, and I'll be able to edit with an actual quote of what was said. It's much more impressive in His words than my own.
Edit: Quote from Brock McKay on disqualification, courtesy of newlifeequip.org:
"It shortchanges the possibility for people to walk out this incredible identity that each one of us has and we have no right anymore to lay claim to being disqualified. It's covered by the blood of the lamb. We have no right to lay claim to being disqualified. It's not our stuff. It's one of the reasons why the Lord Jesus, on the cross, in the midst of all the intensity, in the pain of not just his death, but the burden of the weight of sin that was on his shoulders at that point, says out loud to the Father, to the world, to the heavens, "It's finished. It's done." If the Lord Jesus says it's done, there is nobody who can call that back. There is nobody who can disagree with that."